"Children born today will grow up in a world without DOMA." -Edie Windsor, 6/26/13
It was upon hearing plaintiff Edie Windsor say these ten words, as I stood in a conference room filled with my exuberant, proud colleagues this morning, that I finally teared up. The Defense of Marriage Act - DOMA - has been taken down. I am feeling such a mix of emotions. It has been a whirlwind of a week, politically - between the Supreme Court gutting the Voting Rights Act and blatantly disregarding the Indian Child Welfare Act, and the ever ongoing fight to defend reproductive rights in the state of Texas - and now the end of DOMA and Prop 8. We are living in complicated times - simultaneously disappointing and inspiring.
People have been calling Edie a "shero" and comparing her to Rosa Parks, Harvey Milk, and Martin Luther King, Jr. And to me, those are short-sighted (even offensive) comparisons. Edie is a privileged, white, wealthy woman with access to incredible resources who maybe just happened to be in the right place at the right time. She was a palatable icon for the marriage equality movement and was strategically employed by a huge movement of people working toward marriage equality for many years. Her case was based on the fact that she had to pay more than $350K in estate taxes. She is a charming, thoughtful person, and a great activist; but she did not single-handedly take down DOMA.
But these ten words moved me. When I think about little Peanut, and the world in which she will now grow up, I have to say I'm incredibly grateful that she will not have to know DOMA, or have the experience in which her parents' marriage is sort-of-but-not-really recognized (well, at least on the federal level).
Today, I was so grateful for my colleagues and thousands
of people who have been tirelessly working to secure equal rights and
protections for queer folks who choose to get legally married. I am feeling lucky to be alive at this moment in queer history.
Now more resources, energy and attention should be directed into the immense work for equality and justice that remains. Radicals and leftists to whom I look up, and for whom I have a great deal of respect, have done right to remind me today that marriage is the wrong goal
in movements for equality and justice, and that there is much, much
work to be done on many different priorities that affect the most
vulnerable among us.
