It has been a month of half-written posts - about the election, about watching Ricki Lake's film The Business of Being Born and beginning to think about my own process of giving birth, about the baby shower my family threw for us, about taking a healthy pregnancy class. It has been a very busy month and I've grown more tired with each passing week. Most nights I don't feel like turning the computer on to write. But I miss the process of writing, and there is so much I want to document for myself and for our little one as the weeks fly rapidly by. Tomorrow I will be 32 weeks pregnant. 8 months along. Our little one will be here unbelievably soon.
One of the most valuable tidbits I've picked up during this past month came from the aforementioned healthy pregnancy class. The nurse leading the class started off by saying, "it's good to have a plan. And a plan B. And then, you need a backup plan, a contingency plan, and then you'll realize that many aspects of parenthood are totally unpredictable and all your plans will go out the window."
It was a direct reference to the fact that as a result of superstorm Sandy, the hospital where we plan to give birth is actually closed. It could be weeks, it could be months, before the hospital re-opens. When I spoke to my OB about the situation in mid-November, she said they were temporarily delivering at a hospital uptown. I laughed to myself, realizing it was the same hospital with which we had originally considered working. I began to prepare emotionally. I needed to be flexible enough to deliver at either hospital, and to perhaps not know at which one we would actually end up until a week or two prior to giving birth.
Today, I had another visit with my OB. She let me know that they are now delivering at a different hospital, located downtown. While it's certainly closer to where we live, I don't know anything about their approaches or policies. The news threw me for a loop. It now seems our original plan to work with a hospital which is known for its newborn rooming-in policy, breastfeeding support, and allowing partners to stay overnight have indeed "gone out the window." Rumors say our hospital may not open until February, if not later.
Between this news and the fact that my office building also may not re-open before it is time for me to go on parental leave, it has been an interesting few weeks. I'm someone who relies heavily on planning and predictability for my personal wellness. Yet life seems intent on teaching me that there isn't much in life that's actually in my control. And while it's not entirely comfortable, I'm actually doing ok with the uncertainty in my life right now. I'm just grateful that despite all the logistical challenges, I still have a job I love and an OB I trust to help us bring our little one into the world as safely as possible. Perhaps there are important reasons for these changes in our plans.
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